Justin Update

Some things that are up with Justin:

• Here's a picture of Justin taped by his PT. Actually two pictures, she did front and back this time. It seemed to do what it is supposed to do, which is give his muscles more "input" to get them to work right. The tape stays on for up to 4 days, which works well since PT is Thursdays and OT is Monday, so he gets tape Thursday and we remove it Monday evening. It can go in the bathtub and swimming with no problem (but heat makes it stick more, so NO drying it with a hairdryer!) Justin doesn't seem bothered by it. We will remove this set tonight, and this is the first time we have done the stomach taping, which happens to cross his belly button, and he has quite the outie, so I wonder how that will be affected. More on that later...

He has the tape on under the washcloth. On his BACK, not his head!




• We are having HUGE food issues! Every day it is a fight to get something in his stomach. The only things he really eats consistently are his breakfast of cereal, fruit, and milk (we try to feed him one liquidy meal to make up for his drinking problem- yes, that's what we call it), yogurt, and applesauce. Not really enough to call it a balanced diet. Some days he won't take anything off a spoon, other days he won't pick up anything off his tray, other times he screams if we try to put anything in his mouth at all, and he wants to examine it from every angle to determine if it's worthy to be consumed. It was hard to give Randy instructions for feeding this weekend while I worked. So he mostly ate yogurt and applesauce. Very hard when a child is taking harsh medicines. I learned the hard way on Friday that I should take the "take with food" warnings serious on Justin's antibiotic. (The first round of meds from the urgent care clinic did not work so we had to go back to the dr. when we returned home.) And I also learned that if your child acts at all sick, do not feed him blackberries. Purple is not pretty color when it comes up... Friday I fed him broccoli and he decapitated every piece and loved it! Won't touch it now... Any ideas? I am getting desperate!

Examining the broccoli before consumption...

The remainder in his bib...Watermelon, broccoli, and water.

• Justin did great swimming in Phoenix. He rode with my mom on the pool noodles and jumped and really pushed with his legs. Really good exercise! His legs seem to be stronger than his arms, so I hope the taping helps improve that.

And I forgot to mention that Travis got a water gun in Phoenix. So much fun for him!

• I cannot say how how truly wonderful Travis is as Justin's big brother. He is always trying to teach him things, share his toys, sing songs, and generally involve him in everything. This morning he said Justin should sit right here as he patted the floor, so he could watch Travis and me play fishing. Justin and I fished for Travis and when we caught him, Justin would chew on his finger to decide if he tasted good enough to eat, or if we should throw him back and try again. Travis loved it! And Justin got to chew on something other than ME! This was Travis helping Justin ride his horse, and he was very gentle in bouncing the horse. It honestly brings me tears as I ponder their future as siblings when Randy and I are gone.

One More Diversion and Then Back Home

My cousin, Carl, whose family we visited the other night, happens to be a firefighter in Scottsdale. And I happen to have a son obsessed with trucks. It worked out very well that Carl invited us to visit his fire station one morning after work. He works 24 hours on-24 hours off so when he got off in the morning, we arranged to meet him. His night had been fairly uneventful, so he was more awake than I am after a night of work.

One of the trucks was out on a call but we got to explore the other one. Carl was able to show him where he sits and what he does when they have emergencies. Thankfully their station is in a fairly residential area, so we could not play with the siren. Carl recounted the story of another child being allowed to pull the cord of the siren and he would not let go, so they had to lift him up to get him to release his strangle hold on the cord!

Carl gave us junior firefighters hats, badges, and even some pencils (not sharpened, thank goodness!)

Travis got to sit in the captain's chair and watch the computer.

Carl let him wear the headphones and hear how they talk with each other when the siren is blaring. This fascinated Travis!

Of course we had to check out some of the firehoses.

And Justin even got into some of the action.

And a few pictures of the boys with cousin Carl. Even Mommy got in a picture!

It was great to see where Carl works, and I think Travis will be willing to go back whenever we want. We did get to see the other truck come through quickly between assignments. His station has two trucks assigned to it right now, but they are building a new station which will house three trucks when it is completed. They were also doing a Soles for Souls shoe drive (I think that's what it was called) and they had about 50 large garbage bags full of shoes. Plus several large boxes. It was impressive!

And then it was time to make the trek back home. I was ready to be home, but I was also sorry to leave my mom with so much left to do. The boys needed to be home too. So we headed back to Texas, to collect one of the shipments that we had sent from Phoenix. Fortunately our plane was late, and someone else was able to pick up the very heavy boxes so I didn't have to!

We got home late Tuesday and the boys didn't get to bed until about 9:30. I was prepared for another early morning, but YEAH! I love changing times this direction! I had unwittingly made a chiropractic appointment for that morning (wise, considering the shape I was after all that lifting and moving!) but it was for 8 am. I woke up at 6:30 and drank a cup of coffee Randy had left for me (something I rarely do because there is no amount of cream and sugar that can make it more than barely palatable). Travis stumbled out of his room at 7 am and we had to wake Justin at 7:30 to leave for the appointment. It took a couple of days for them to get back to normal (sigh...) But those were some good mornings!

So that's what we've been doing. Now it's back to work and therapy. I'll have another Justin update soon.

Blood, Sweat, and Tears

The original purpose of my trip was to help my mom sort, pack, and ship her things to prepare for the sale of her condo. We really didn't get to work on that until Friday, after the party and after everyone left. So that left mom, me, and the boys. Two semi-sick and needy boys. I am sure that Justin's first words are going to be, "I want mommy" because that is what he hears most often! Between cuddles and meals and playtime we did manage to get some work done.

It is difficult to plan and execute a move in an ordinary situation, when you pack up all your belongings and move from one place to another. But my mom already has a condo in WI, that is perfectly outfitted with everything a person needs. So this was a bit more challenging. The things we had to save were the things that my parents had brought to Phoenix originally, and also the mementos that were accumulated during the time there. And THEN we had to decide what went where: WI or TX, plus there were the items going to WA for Mireille (remember the desk??) So we had piles...everywhere! We had to clear places for Justin to sit, and ensure that he had nothing dangerous within reach, and his reach is getting farther every day!

Some moments were easier than others. Going through the pictures was one particularly hard time. It's so easy to wonder and doubt things that you once counted as true. I listened to my mom and we shared stories and cried together. It's truly a death. Like the "death" Randy and I felt when Justin was born. The death of our dreams, but also the creation of new ones. Neither is better, just different. I ached for her, knowing that I couldn't take away the pain, but that I could only listen and shoulder her grief when it was too much to bear alone. I fought my own emotions through the process. I did a lot of talking with God and asking for understanding. My list of questions for God when I get to heaven gets longer every day!

There were some crazy times too. One memory that I have etched in my head was preparing my mom's sewing machine table to be shipped. We took out the sewing machine and took off the legs and then I looked at Mommy Sharon (remember: 70-something years old?) and I said, "Do you think you can help me carry this upstairs?" I cannot believe those words came out of my mouth! Even now I shake my head at my stupidity! It was not a light table, and it was upstairs! To my credit, she did say, "Sure, if you carry the heavy end." (With the drawers) Okay, so we started up, and we made it around the first set of stairs and I was smashed against the wall, which has a large mirror and I said, "Okay, you have to keep moving." To which she replied, "I am trying!!" Somehow we tumbled up the last few stairs and she sort of fell up the last two and the sewing machine started falling on the backs of her legs (she had gone up facing forward) and I was envisioning myself crumbled at the bottom of the stairs under a pile of shards of mirror and covered with sewing notions. My mom came to the rescue and we managed to get the table set down. And that's where it stayed, at the top of the steps, until our muscles reformed from their jelly-like state. We got it out to the garage and it did get shipped without further incident. It did, somehow, leave a trail of safety pins wherever it went. (?)

I am so glad that God created our bodies to heal themselves. I am so covered in cuts, scrapes, and bruises, that if they had to be cut out, like we do with the bad spots of fruits, I am sure I would not have a leg left to stand on! I even have a bruise on my chest from that sewing table when it rested on me as we stumbled up the stairs. And my toe. How do you get a bruise on your toe? I know I didn't drop anything on it. I would have remembered that!

In the end, after 2 rounds of shipping we sent 40 boxes and pieces of furniture (total, not each!) totalling 1,750 pounds! It's oddly rewarding to have a scale confirm that, yes, that IS a heavy box! Of that total I lifted at least 1,000 pounds of that myself, SEVERAL TIMES! No gym for me last week. I finally had to stop and remind everyone that I still am just a girl and I cannot lift as much as my brother. I am very thankful that the truck we had help us haul everything to the shipper had a lift on the back so I didn't have to carry the desk one more time. It took Jerry, Mireille, and me to move it out of the house into the garage. The thought of lifting it again was not a pleasant one.

I didn't really think pictures of packing would be all that interesting, but there was time for a bit of entertainment. One thing we found while sorting was glasses. Lots of glasses: sunglasses, reading glasses, weird glasses, etc. So my sister took a couple of pictures with her phone and sent them to me.

I am glad I went and spent the time on Phoenix. I have some great memories there, even if I never really lived there. There is something about Phoenix that attracts lots of different people. I stil have family there, and friends, so I know we will be back. But for this trip, it was now time to go home!

Good-Byes and Hellos

Friday morning we had to say good-bye to Jerry and Mireille. They left early (no problem for us!) and there were many tearful farewells. Check out Ami's kiss on Justin's cheek!

And then they were gone. It was a difficult good-bye, but we know we will see them again soon. They plan to come back for the Buddy Walk, and we will be glad to see them!

Then we had to say good-bye to Daddy Jack and Mommy Sharon; they left early to spend the weekend with their daughter and her family who live in Phoenix. They came back Monday morning, and it was not soon enough! Jack was such a good playmate for Travis! They would play on the porch and feed the ducks, go for LONG walks (Travis' words) and play hide and seek. Jack would muse, "I wonder where Travis is?" and Travis would respond, " I am under the stairs!!" We might have to teach him some more about that game! And it really helped having another pair of hands for Justin too. Then two people could be packing and one on baby duty. Oh, well, it was just us for the weekend!

So, everyone was gone and we got to work! Travis fixed the stairs, and Uncle Johnny taught him all about hack saws, planers, pipe wrenches, crescent wrenches, and ratchets. He really knows his tools now!

(Still working on the w-sitting...without much success!)

We packed boxes and sorted through papers, clothes, everything you can imagine from a house. The boys did very well. Travis was in heaven fixing everything, and Justin spent a lot of time in a laundry basket so he couldn't reach the little bits of paper and other things that shouldn't go in a little mouth. At one point we stripped him to his diaper, took him outside, and gave him a popsicle. Mom was holding it until I needed her help, so she gave it to him and he ended up holding the popsicle part and he started screaming! Too cold, Mommy!

Saturday night we went to visit my cousin, Carl, and his wife Lisa, and their son, Mason, who is almost a year old and just started walking. We had not met Mason yet, so that was a special treat. Travis gave Mason a good workout as Mason attempted to keep up with Travis. We tried to get a picture with all of the boys, and this was the best we could do. Mason's birthday is not until July and look how he compares to Justin!

I think Lisa enjoyed snuggling with Justin since her son is already bigger than Justin and of course he moves much faster than Justin!

Travis and Mason decided to hide under the table and be sneaky. We found them pretty easily!

On Sunday we got to meet my brother's girlfriend, Olivia. She just flew into town for the summer from Pennsylvania. I missed getting a picture of her, sorry! She and Jon had gone to school together several years ago and have just recently reconnected. Travis really enjoyed playing with Olivia. She works with kids and it was very obvious as Travis did not want her to leave ever! He told her that he loves her, and that he wanted to sit by her at dinner. It's good that she has two sides, or Jon would have gotten left out! Some of Travis' favorite toys are ribbons, ropes, strings, or anything that can tie things together so they can be towed or fished. And my mom has stairs that you can see through (see the above pictures of Travis working) so they make for perfect fishing! Travis was having Olivia tie his tools onto his strings so he could fish for them. (Usually my job, not sad to have it reassigned, at least temporarily!)

So, it was a good weekend, with some diversions, but lots of work! That's next...

The Trip West and the Party!

I mentioned that my mom and brother drove to Phoenix, so I had to wait with the boys and Mommy Sharon and Daddy Jack in Houston until they arrived. Our first mistake was leaving earlier than we had planned. We had planned to leave Wed. morning, but opted for Tuesday night after mom and Jon decided to drive straight through. Have you even been in a situation and for a moment looked at it from the outside and almost laughed because it was never a situation you ever thought you would be in? That was us on the airplane. The 5 of us must have looked a little crazy walking through the airport. I would have thought that I would have been the one to corral everyone given that I was traveling with a seventy-something year-old woman and an eighty-something year-old man, and 2 toddlers. Instead, it was Mommy Sharon hefting the backpack with all the kids' supplies, and pulling their carry-on backpack. And Daddy Jack was carrying the car seat. That left me with Justin in the front carrier and Travis walking with his backpack. I was the most free I have ever felt while traveling! I never thought I would be traveling with that collection of people!

Okay, so the mistake was when we got to Phoenix and we learned that the air conditioning was not working. In Phoenix. In June. And it was past bedtime by the time we got back to the house. So the boys went to bed in only bottoms with the fans blowing full speed. That was the longest night EVER! Travis was up at 10, 11 and 12 and then Justin picked up at 3, 4 and 5 am when both kids woke up for the day. And remember, they had been sick and just didn't seem to be getting better. So we called our secretary (Randy, the only one with Internet access) and found an urgent care clinic nearby, but of course it didn't open until the afternoon. So we went to a friend's house for a while to go swimming while my mom waited for the a/c repair man. Even being sick, the kids had fun.

They had this great water gun, and Travis enjoyed that the best.

Then the clinic was open, so that was our next stop. Travis was nearly hysterical about going to the doctor. He really is rarely sick, and so when we go to the doctor for Justin he is always VERY clear that we are there for JUSTIN, and not for him. This time he had a fever, but he did not want anyone to touch him. So Justin went first and the doctor had to pick ear wax out of his ear in order to see inside his ears. Justin did not like that and he screamed the whole time. Way to prepare Travis! So Justin had an ear infection. At least in the one ear she could clear enough to see. Good mommy for taking him on an airplane the day before! Then Travis was more challenging and they had to do a chest x-ray and a finger stick. Travis did not like either one, but we made it through both, and it turns out that Travis had the beginnings of pneumonia. So they both got antibiotics and we headed back to the now-cool condo for another semi-restless night.

The entire time we were there, the children never really adapted to the time change, so we were up at close to 5 am every morning. And the floors creaked, so whenever I was up to care for Justin, Travis woke too. Usually I could tell him to go back to sleep, but not always. Then he came into the single bed where I was sleeping until I could disentangle myself and go over to HIS bed, until we started the process over again.

The second night we were there, Jerry and Mireille arrived so they took over the room where Justin had been sleeping, so he moved into the walk-in closet in our room. (Without the door closed, of course! What were you thinking?!) During the night it got cold and I had to put some of Travis' socks on Justin to keep him warm. (I hadn't brought any for Justin- he doesn't often wear shoes, and it was Phoenix. In June.) He has poor circulation anyway, so he always gets cold first. He looked funny with socks dripping off his feet!

Travis woke up with a very red rash on his face and neck so that afternoon it was back to the clinic. Travis started screaming when we drove into the parking lot. Smart boy. As I suspected, rashes are easy to diagnose, but hard to determine the cause. So we were sent home with another prescription for antibiotics, and hope he gets better. (He did by the next day.) Even being sick, he jumped at the chance to go with my mom to buy him some toys. Check out what he picked:

That night was the open house/party for Jerry and Mireille. We had an odd mix of people, but it was so fun to see them! My friend from college who is pregnant came with her 2 boys. The last time I saw her was when I was pregnant with Justin, in the Houston airport on her way through. I am SO glad she came since I knew we would be so busy that I wouldn't get to see her any other time while we were there. The boys played with sling shots my mom had gotten to feed the ducks in the lake below. They put dog food in the sling shots and let it go! That was a blast for them. My cousin came with his girlfriend, whom I had not met.

After the party we had to pack some things that they (Jerry and Mireille) were wanting to be shipped from my mom's condo. That is furniture. Big furniture. Like a desk and file cabinets. So we spent the evening hours wrapping cardboard and plastic wrap around everything. I wasn't wearing shoes, so when I came in, I flopped exhausted into a chair and asked for someone to be Jesus for me and wash my feet. Both my mom and Mommy Sharon quickly responded that they would do it. I was truly humbled and astonished at what friendship and a commitment to living as Christ would live cause a person to do. (I washed my feet myself, in my mom's big bathtub, no worries!)

The End of an Era

In the summer of 1966 my parents were married and they jumped into their car and drove straight through from Wisconsin to Arizona. They cruised into town after dark on Sunday night, because my dad had to start summer classes at ASU Monday morning. According to the story, the temperature was over 100 degrees and I think it was after midnight. Well, at that moment my mom was hooked. My dad finished classes and they returned to WI and got jobs, raised their family, and my mom dreamed of AZ. She is totally a hot weather, beach, swimming girl. She lived in WI, and even spent a year in even colder Minnesota, until God saw fit to return her to her dream place 19 years later. My family packed up and we drove straight through from WI to AZ, this time for ME to begin summer classes at ASU.

My family spent the rest of their years together in AZ; my three siblings graduated from HS in AZ and my brother still lives there. Since my parents' divorce, my mom has continued to maintain a home there, splitting time between there and WI. That all ended this week as my mom sold her home. I spent the past week helping her sort through her belongings: piles of pictures, wedding gifts well-used but their meaning now so muddled, duplicate household items to be distributed to children or discarded, and all covered in tears for hopes and dreams that will never be realized.

Over the next few days I will reconstruct our week in Phoenix. It was a VERY full week, with lots of highs and lows. We did lots of sorting and packing, but there was also time for swimming, visits with friends and family, and long walks. There were some LONG nights, and some short ones too. And even a trip to the urgent care clinic!

Ami

Nearly three years ago, my sister moved to Houston to be near us. She had just finished her doctorate in Psychology and she came to town in search of a job. She lived with us for 5 months and then she moved to a nearby apartment, and then she moved closer to her job, and this past week, she quit her job, got married, and moved to Seattle. We had such a great time having her here, but we know it was time for her to go. We shared some fabulous times and some really hard times, but through it all, we were here for each other. We are still here for each other, but only in heart and mind. I just thought I would share some memories of Ami (Aunt Mireille):

Here she is leaving for her first day of work as a psychologist.

She did a lot of hanging out with Baby Travis:

One huge benefit for me was that when Mireille arrived, we gained a photographer! That meant I finally was able to appear in some pictures with my sweet boy. This was the first time Travis got sick and Mireille decided that it needed to be photographed. He sure looks pitiful, doesn't he?

She helped to decorate the Christmas tree, or rather, she wrestled with Travis while RANDY worked on the tree.

She was here for Justin's birth too. Labor was during the night, so I called to warn her that it would probably be sometime during the night that we would need her. She didn't sleep a wink until we called her back at 3 am and she was at our house in record time. She was on babysitting duty, but my mom had on a whim decided to catch the red eye flight to Houston and she relieved Mireille in time to get to the birth center. She helped our doula and she was a great backup when Randy was otherwise occupied.

She served as a pillow for our children:

She was around for Justin's surgery and served as a safe haven in the aftermath of Ike:

She walked in the Buddy Walk with us:

She helped teach Justin how to eat.

She was here for so many holidays, birthday parties, movie nights, and just good times. She taught Travis how to crawl, and we told her she had to do the same for Justin and she couldn't leave until she finished her job, but she left anyway. We haven't even fully felt the reality of our Mireille-less life, but already it's sad.